My beloved husband sometimes says I overthink things. I’m
pretty sure this is one of those times.
Let me start by explaining that “tzedakah” is the Hebrew word for “justice” or “righteousness.” When
we give money to a person who needs it, it is not an act of charity; it is an
act of justice. All Jews are commanded to give tzedakah. In fact, the first thing a person is supposed to do when
they receive tzedakah is to turn
around and give tzedakah to someone
else.
There is a wonderful story about two beggars in a little
town. They were both having a bad day, and each one only had one coin to his
name. When they passed each other on the street, the first beggar gave his only
coin as tzedakah to the second one,
and the second beggar gave his one coin to the first one. As they continued on
their way, they each still had only one coin, but they were both richer for the
experience.
So, here’s my story: There is a large strip mall near where
I work. I often go there for various reasons, including to shop at Safeway or
Costco, to get lunch, to do some banking, or to pick up something at the dry
cleaner’s or the drug store. Often, there is a person holding a sign asking for
money, standing at the parking lot exit.
My first bit of overthinking involves the sentence above. In
this post I could call these folks “homeless people,” but I don’t know whether
or not they are homeless. Sometimes they have a sign saying they are homeless,
but often the sign doesn’t specify their living arrangements.
I could call them “beggars,” but that seems a bit
derogatory. I assume these folks are just doing this temporarily – it’s not
like it’s their vocation. What they are doing now shouldn’t become a label with
which we define them. The term “beggar” seems to lessen their humanity. So,
what should I call these people? I don’t have a good answer.
When I see a person asking for money, there is no question
about what I should do. I know that no matter what I intend to buy that day,
it’s going to cost me some extra cash if there is a person waiting at the exit.
I used to automatically give the person a dollar. But then I
thought, “I’ve been giving people with signs a dollar for years.” During that
time, the price of pretty much everything has increased. As a result, the value
of the dollar I have been giving by rote has decreased quite a bit since I
first started giving them out. So recently, everyone got a raise. I upped it to
two dollars.
At any rate (yes, that was a bad pun – sorry about that), I
noticed that every time I give some cash to one of the people at the exit, it’s
a different person. There never seems to be the same person there twice. They
seem to be on some sort of rotation. Why is that? I started to wonder if there is some sort of
schedule that they have worked out.
Then, I started thinking, maybe it’s an experiment. I can
imagine some professor dreaming up a study, and having different types of
people with different types of signs standing on different days in the same
place.
An unobtrusive observer would be taking notes about how many
people stop and how much money they give, and then do an analysis based on the
receiver’s race, gender, clothing, sign, etc. They could even do a
cross-correlation based on the giver’s race, gender, clothing, type of car,
etc.
The above scenario is probably just another object of my
habit of overthinking.
The next bit of overthinking comes in when I use the second
entrance to the strip mall instead of the first one. This is the entrance that
goes by Costco, but also leads to a number of other destinations.
If I’m going to one of the other destinations, I have to
pass by the exit from the Costco parking lot, where there is also often a
person asking for money. The question arises (in my mind, anyway), if I’m not
going to Costco, is, “Am I obligated to go out of my way to drive into the
Costco parking lot anyway, so I can drive back out and give the person there
some money?”
After all, even though it would be a bit out of my way, I
can see the person standing there. They need money. I don’t think we’re only
supposed to give tzedakah when it’s
utterly convenient to do so.
Yesterday, it got a little worse. I actually was going to Costco,
and as I drove by the guy at the exit and parked, I was thinking I would give
him some money on the way out. But then I thought, “What if he isn’t there any
more? What if he leaves while I’m in the store?”
We are told that we should run, not walk, to do a mitzvah, lest we lost the opportunity. I
wrote a whole story about that a number of years ago. So, I actually got out of
my car, walked over to the exit, and gave the guy some money before I walked
back through the parking lot and into the store.
But then, as I got ready to leave the store, I kept
thinking, “I already gave him money. I’m not obligated to give him more on my
way out. But if I just drive past him on the way out without giving him
anything, and he doesn’t recognize me (and why would he?) then he may think,
‘There goes yet another uncaring person who won’t help me out.’ Ugh.”
I suppose, if I were a better person, I would have just
given him another buck or two. But instead, I went out of my way to drive out
another exit. And now I’m still thinking about it.
thanks alot vecry mu
ReplyDeletethanks
ReplyDelete